Aaah!! Memories

So I was reading back several years ago in my blog and found it so interesting that life hasn't changed that much in five years. With the exception of 2 additional children things move along the same. That is of course the bickering and arguing. The messes and the chaos. It still continues and and has only multiplied in intensity. Sometimes I wonder "what was I thinking....4 kids!!! Aargh!" But then I am quickly humbled and reminded of the true blessing it is to be a mother. Last night I had an epiphany. After screaming and yelling at my children for 1) dumping a pile of cinnamon/sugar mixture into the dogs water bowl 2) writing a myriad of numbers on the wall in the bedroom 3) writing with my lipstick on the inside of my bathroom cupboard 4) nearly breaking the zipper wide open on the Love Sac 5) and finally the increase in the contention level rising to an all time high. And to top if off...Nick is out of town. So to handle all of this on my own whilst keeping my sanity. Apparently I am not capable of doing that because I lost it. And then after a tear filled conversation with Nick I realized how wrong I was. I am the mother and therefore have to set the example (not an easy thing to do when your frustration level is through the roof). Anyway. Needless to say there was much apologizing going on this morning as I am trying to set a precedence of patience and forgiveness. I truly love my children and pray that through all my mistakes that they turn out to be the wonderful people I know they can be. I pray that they will be just like their dad who is the epitome of patience and love.